(source) 

Let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God…

Hebrews 13:15

Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.

Colossians 3:16

Sing to Me.

I heard the words as if they were whispered in my dormant ear.

Me? Sing? But I can’t sing, can’t hear the tune to match my voice along the sounds that make a song. You know I’m not a singer, Lord. Deaf girls don’t sing.

Silence.

I’d been asking the Father why my walk with Him seemed dry and just a little off lately. I’d sensed a distance, a disconnect. By now I’ve delighted In His nearness for so many years that the nagging sense that my heart was growing tepid worried me.

What was wrong?

After turning the searchlight of His Word onto my daily life and asking Him to show me anywhere I might be messing up, drifting from His ways, I came up with a handful of not-so-obvious sins to confess: a little selfishness here, a critical tendency there, a good bit of laziness, my usual sin of self-indulgence.

Still the silence rang loud.

Until this morning, when I asked again.

Lord, what is up? What is wrong? I need You, need that closeness, that joy, that hope that rallies me out of my warm bed on a cold morning to meet You in that place I crave.

And that’s when I heard Him say it once more.

Sing to Me.

But Lord, please. I can’t sing.

At church I mostly fake it, or hide under the loudness and face away from anyone near. Sometimes I just stop and watch and pray and sing deep where no one hears. I raise my hands while those around me raise their voices.

Sing to Me, Di.

But Phil might hear. What would he think? I’ve tried singing on my walks but that’s embarrassing too. What must the neighbors think? A woman and her dog walking down the street singing hymns that sound like two-tone, out of tune meanderings of a mad woman. Please!

Just sing to Me, Di, I love when you sing. I love that sound of tuneless worship. Like Mary’s broken box of sweet perfume spilled on My feet, wiped with her mass of tangled hair.

Sing in the beauty of your brokenness, Di, and delight Me. Forget about anyone and everyone else.

Sing to Me.

And so I pulled on thick, warm socks, grabbed the green hymnal off the bookshelf—  the one I’d  learned so long ago to worship with— and headed down two flights of stairs to the basement. Huddled by the heater, wrapped in my favorite blanket, I opened to an old favorite.

Are ye able, said the Master,

To be crucified with Me?

Yea, the conquering Christians answered,

To the death we follow Thee.

And then that second verse, asking if I am able to remember the thief who lifted his face to Jesus to find his soul pardoned and invited into His presence.

And all I can remember is that one I cannot seem to thoroughly forgive. The one who doesn’t seem sorry enough for all the wounded  left in the wake of a selfish pursuit of  happiness.

Oh Father, forgive me for the stinginess of my grace. Who am I to hold a sin against someone when You do not?

I found myself singing it again and again, louder each time, more free and full than I’d felt in a long, long time.

Lord, we are able, our spirits are Thine,

Remold them, make us like Thee, divine…

Another hymn, louder.

Again and again, with increasing confidence.

Yes! This is what I want because this is what He wants.

My gift to Him. My off-kilter, broken, not-very-lovely gift is the one He cherishes most.

And suddenly it dawned on me, how Mary must have been embarrassed when she huddled at His feet, wiping them with her tears. How the misunderstanding of unmerciful men must have weighed heavy on her unwrapped head. Were her tears like mine?

The humiliation of obedience?

The spilling of what she’d held too tight?

The relief of letting go?

And what about David when he danced before God? Had God whispered to him like He did to me?

Strip off your royal robes, David, down to the plain tunic that hides nothing. Fling off your dignity and dance for Me.

I don’t know, but I do know that this hour I’ve spent singing has released something somewhere in my insides.

And I know I’ll be back.

Back to the basement, the old green hymnal open on my lap, singing my heart out.

What about you, my dear ones?

Is He asking something of you?

Something  surprising?

Something hard?

Something so laughably easy that you’re certain it couldn’t be all He wants?

Will you listen?

Will you sing?

From my heart, filled to overflowing,

Diane

repost: march 2013

On this Monday in mid-August I am relishing time with my family in the mountains of California. We’ve gathered our growing family— fifteen of us now— in a rare moment to focus just on each other. Allison, a member of the team that creates this blog, agreed to write this week’s post Her story is as unusual as her life: occasionally glamorous and exciting, often times lonely, rarely what she’d planned. She is learning, along with all of us, what it means to put her hope wholly in God.

From My Heart,

Diane

I sit here across from a handsome tattooed man at our hand-me-down dining table, and am faced with the task of trying to sum up the millions of life lessons I've already learned since saying, "I do."

Where do I begin?

How can I possibly begin to explain to you how this gentle yet rugged man can melt me with a few guitar chords and his raspy voice?

Will I be able to explain to you how my heart sinks every time we pull up to the airport?

Or how my butterflies flare up every time I return to pick him up outside of baggage claim?

How week after week of saying goodbye never gets easier, and how each time he returns from a trip I am equally as nervous and excited to see him as I was the last time. Is it possible to sum up the stretching that took place as I moved across the country with this man?

Can I properly portray our odd lifestyle in just one short blog?

Well... here goes nothin'...

Making the decision to marry Nick was the easy part. There was not a doubt in my mind I was ready to marry this man. It was the calling that came with being his wife that held some weighty requirements. He had been preparing the field, tilling the grounds of his music career in Nasvhille, TN for three years, and upon saying our vows, I promised to join him in making our home there as a couple.

Leaving all I'd ever known behind in Portland, I climbed shakily into that ten foot Budget truck heading east 2300 miles to my new home. I remember looking in the side mirror as my family waved goodbye, running through my list of fears and what if's. Then looking to my left at my steady driver, I took a deep breath and smiled. God had called me to this life, and I was ready for it to begin.

We arrived in the southern June humidity, unloaded our truck, and then Nick left straight to the studio to record their new album. He's part of a Christian rock band called Kutless, and our honeymoon had just clipped into their studio time. It was "hello new town, new house, new friends," and "bye bye husband!" Not forever, but definitely often. While learning how to live with my new roommate, I was also having to say goodbye to him every few days for days and weeks at a time.

Our foundation for communication was built on choppy cell service, busy dressing rooms, and sorting through disagreements in the back of a crowded tour bus. With no guarantees of finishing conversations, we very quickly learned that relying on "ideal conditions" was never going to be an option for our marriage's success. Every band wife would agree that the following feaux gospel quote is most true: "Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not break."

My most remembered application of this quote happened this past November, when Nick and I decided to move back to Portland. The month had a daunting tour schedule, leaving me to pack a bulk of the house alone and complete any finishing touches on our home before heading west. As expected, I became overwhelmed with anxiety both physically and mentally. My to do list's were a mile long, and all the while I was left missing my husband. With Nick in Norway nine hours ahead of me, our communication was minimal. I felt like I was being choked, and thought (foolishly) that I wouldn't be able to survive that week without Nick. Boy, what a dangerous place I had come to. It was then that I realized the place of idolship I had placed Nick in. His absence that week felt like devesation, but God was using it to help me to lean more heavily on Him, the One who holds ALL things together.

I spent that week pouring my heart out to Jesus, and was delightfully enveloped and filled with love and the strength I needed for that week of packing. Nick was no where in sight, and I MADE IT! Would the packing have been easier with him there? Absolutely! However, I would have never learned that valuable life lesson of trust and sufficiency in God alone.

I am so grateful.

For me it's taken having a husband who is away two thirds of the year to realize my need to depend solely on Jesus for my joy and strength.

Maybe for some of you single girls, it's been the challenge of simply being single that's urged you into romance with your Maker.

For the mamas up nursing in the middle of the night, it's Jesus who's there calming your weary heart.

For the widow, or divorcee, it's the hurts and loss that brings you to Jesus' feet.

Our life is anything but ordinary, but after two years, I feel like I've learned to love it. It has taught me so much about myself and my relationship with God. Things I would have never learned otherwise. I've learned that we live in a world of uncertain circumstances. Things to wait for, people to miss, hearts that break, worries to combat, but the truth that rings through to our weary souls is that God is, and always will be sufficient for us.

He is the only answer to our trials. The refuge we need to run to first amidst fires and storms.

If I've learned anything in my not-so-normal marriage to this musician husband of mine, it's that he is not the answer to my problems.

God is.

Ladies, I truly believe that what we would define as "lack" in our lives, is actually a space that God wants to fill. I want to challenge you (and myself) to know that no matter what status you hold, married, single, divorced, you are not lacking. When we seek fulfillment from the desires of our flesh, we will always be left wanting (yes, even with a husband), but with Jesus you are FULL, lacking nothing.

Even the most adventorous and exciting life with my husband has had it's challenges, but the times that we soar the most is when Jesus is on the throne of our hearts.

"Seek first the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33

Allison

Today I want to begin to introduce you to the team of women who design, create, implement, administrate, manage, and advise this blog we call He Speaks In The Silence. These are women who pray, asking God for wisdom, then use their gifts to craft beauty for all of us. And I think you need to know them!

So… for the next many weeks we’ll be posting a fun profile of who they are, what they do, what they love, who they love, how they live and lots more delicious details.

If you want to take a peak at the list of questions we all got to choose from, here it is.

From my heart,

Diane

HILLARY KUPISH

I live in:

SW portland, Multnomah Village.

I contribute to the blog by:

Illustrations.

This year, God is revealing himself to me as:

My Rock. That though the torrents of life may crash against me, I do not have to let myself be torn and swayed. It is one of the most magnificent and peaceful realizations to stand in.

One of my life scriptures is:

“Yahweh, Yahweh, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in love and faithfulness.”

Exodus 34v6

It is the most compelling word of God I have ever read. I am finding that no matter the season of life, if I center myself of who God says He is, then it seems the rest of the world is put into perspective.

My Myers-Briggs is:

INTJ

Something that I love to do every year is:

Get out of the country. (Or at least to a culturally disparate part of the country).

I love the change of perspective, it refreshes my soul. I have a feeling my husband and I will be the friends that still don’t own a house at 40 because we invested our saved money into travels.

I am totally at peace with that idea.

*All investors / financial advisors - feel free to cringe here.

My lifestyle, in three words:

Moving, Creating, Savoring.

My favorite question to ask people is:

What are you scheming about?

I am a dreamer and a planner, and I LOVE to know what passions people are pushing forward.

The next big challenge I'm tackling is:

Moving towards working as a freelance artist & illustrator. God has totally blessed me in redirecting me vocationally to this path, and it is the most fulfilling, challenging, and terrifying process. I am absolutely smitten. It is amazing to me that God builds in passions and desires, hones skill sets, and then actually provides a place for them to be fully executed. This is a - ‘Duh’ - for a lot of people. For me, I spent my college years and first 4 years of work in areas that I thought were ‘realistic’ and lucrative. They were in many respects, and I was blessed by them relationally as well as in skill building. However, I have found when God puts a fire in you for something, it is just plain uncomfortable to let it sit inside you.

My mission is:

Bring the Kingdom via aesthetics.

I'm a sucker for anything containing cookie dough. So naturally when I saw Abi post these cookie dough balls on her blog, I knew they had to be shared with you all!

Plus... you won't even have to turn on your oven. If you are like me and don't have air conditioning this is a BIG plus.

ENJOY!

Elizabeth

CHOCOLATE COOKIE DOUGH BITES

You might be thinking "not another healthy "raw" cookie dough ball thing" and you're right, there's a million out there but I've been trying my hand at them for years and while most taste decent they just don't cut it for actually satisfying a real cookie dough craving.

But these were a game changer!

They were super simple to make, they use ingredients I always have and they actually taste like cookie dough, I promise!

(You can even ask my husband, he ate plenty of them).

I kept mine in the freezer which I would highly recommend, it doesn't get much better than frozen cookie dough. And yes, I guess some might not count these as healthy since they have some chocolate chips in it and use sweeteners (god forbid!) but they are loads healthier than the butter/sugar/brown sugar ones so that's good right? Plus the base is cashews which has protein which is enough to make it a health food in my book!

Abi

INGREDIENTS:

2/3 c raw cashews 1/3 c oats 1 Tbsp shredded coconut 2 Tbsp Agave 1 Tbsp Maple Syrup or Honey 1 tsp Vanilla Extract 1/4 c Chocolate Chips (Mini would look nicer but it all tastes the same...)

TO MAKE:

Blend the cashews and oats in a Vita-Mix, food processor, or high speed blender until they're a fine powder. Don't over-blend or you'll wind up with cashew butter very quickly.

Add the agave, maple, vanilla and blend until incorporated. Be careful to just blend in short bursts and only until combined; don't over-process. You know you have “The Right Consistency” of Dough when the dough starts to ball up like a tennis ball and bangs around from side to side in the canister.

Stir in the chocolate chips by hand.

Form into balls and store in freezer.

If dough is sticky, chilling it in the refrigerator or flash-chilling it in the freezer helps make it easier to form into balls.

[print_this]

CHOCOLATE COOKIE DOUGH BITES

INGREDIENTS:

2/3 c raw cashews 1/3 c oats 1 Tbsp shredded coconut 2 Tbsp Agave 1 Tbsp Maple Syrup or Honey 1 tsp Vanilla Extract 1/4 c Chocolate Chips (Mini would look nicer but it all tastes the same...)

TO MAKE:

Blend the cashews and oats in a Vita-Mix, food processor, or high speed blender until they're a fine powder. Don't over-blend or you'll wind up with cashew butter very quickly.

Add the agave, maple, vanilla and blend until incorporated. Be careful to just blend in short bursts and only until combined; don't over-process. You know you have “The Right Consistency” of Dough when the dough starts to ball up like a tennis ball and bangs around from side to side in the canister.

Stir in the chocolate chips by hand.

Form into balls and store in freezer.

If dough is sticky, chilling it in the refrigerator or flash-chilling it in the freezer helps make it easier to form into balls.

[/print_this]

Dear girls, A few weeks ago I started a conversation about the reasons women no longer want sex. Then, as woman-talk so often does, we got sidetracked. Off on the bunny trail of why I am still in love with my husband after thirty-five years and that secret key for stressed out mamas and other women who work too hard.

So today we circle back to those 3 Reasons  I hear over and over again from women who finally admit that they’re really not all that enthusiastic about initiating and welcoming intimacy with their husbands.

And for those of you who are not yet married, please pay attention! These are obstacles every woman faces at some point in real life. Decide now that you’re going to overcome those glitches because you place imminent value on a healthy sexual relationship with that man who trusts you to meet his needs.

The first reason for no longer loving sex had to do with disappointment in your lover’s romantic efforts. I urged you to remember that he is not your Prince Charming.

Your husband cannot and will not fulfill that gaping hole of need every woman feels.

And gracefully loving him even when he falls short of your ideal is just the way Jesus loves us. It’s not too great a jump to conclude that…

Choosing to pour sexual love on your husband is an act of grateful, grace-filled response to your Redeemer’s tender love towards you.

The second reason we talked about has to do with circumstances.  Overwhelming fatigue, pressure, the realities of too little sleep and not enough space to breath. Pregnancies and nursing babies and teenagers right down the hall who seem to have sonic ears— not exactly how blockbuster movies portray passion.

That’s when commitment comes in. A woman’s commitment to care about her husband and care for herself even when it’s not easy. The comments and ideas that came in for this post were filled with practical wisdom and delightful dashes of humor.

Today, I want to finish this conversation by talking about the third reason women don't want sex:

“Your body isn’t beautiful like the airbrushed, half starved, breast enhanced women in the movies. You’re so intent on hiding the parts you don’t want him to see that you fail to recognize your own inherent sensuality… You don’t want him to see you unclothed because you’ve lost the freedom your beauty brings. The naked and unashamed of the Garden is long gone.”

Beauty. It all comes back to this, doesn’t it?

In order to feel sexual, we need to feel beautiful.

We know that men respond to a woman’s beauty. But do we fully realize how much a woman responds to a man’s response?

As the wife of a pastor, I’ve had a front row seat to a lot of weddings. During the engagement the bride-to-be gets more and more beautiful. She stops biting her nails in order to show off her ring. Starts an intense exercise program in order to fit into her wedding gown. Goes and gets her make-up done and her hair-style updated. Everything for the Wedding Day.

And indeed, on that day, she is absolutely beautiful. Always.

But my favorite thing to watch is when she comes home from her honeymoon.  That’s when her beauty blossoms. No amount of make-up or money can give anyone that slightly seductive swagger a newly married woman carries off.  She wears a certain sort of grin just won’t go away. Kind of a cat-got-the-mouse look, and with a swish of her tail she let’s all the world know that she’s lovely. Beautiful.

Why? Because that young bride is responding to the response of her enthralled husband. He saw her as she is and he loved what he saw and she knows it!  She feels beautiful because she sees her beauty in her husband’s eyes.

And that, my dear girls, is exactly what each of us needs to recapture if we’re going to fully respond to our husbands. We have got to see our beauty from his eyes.

Don’t judge your beauty by what you see in the mirror. The mirror is not the truth. In the mirror you see only your flaws, not your beauty.

Don’t judge your beauty by the magazines or movies. Those pictures are not the truth. They’re airbrushed and positioned and faking reality. No one looks like that in real life.

Don’t judge your beauty by others. You risk insulting the One who made you by wishing He’d done it different. Psalm 139 says He “formed you in your mother’s womb” and He likes the form He made.

But, you say, I’m not a beauty. I’m plain or plump or flat-chested. My skin is bad, my hair is limp, my eyes are droopy, my legs unshapely. You’re not being modest, you’re being honest. Shouldn’t you just settle for the truth as you see it and ignore beauty? After all, there’s more to being a woman than being beautiful, right?

Here’s the problem with that way of thinking: You and I need to feel beautiful in order to act sexual.

Ugliness and sensuality just don’t work for us. No amount of reasoning about how smart we are or how much we’ve accomplished is going to compel us to actively seduce our waiting husbands. That’s just not the way a woman is wired.

So what to do?

1. Decide in your mind that God made you beautiful. Elohim, the creator-God crafted you uniquely. He is not bound by time or culture. He is undeterred by what color hair or skin or shape of figure is currently in vogue.  He is able to see the way He made you as a reflection of His own creativity. His beauty.

In order to think right, we have got to come to an intelligent agreement with God about how He made us. Our minds inform our emotions. When I decide with my mind that God made me beautiful, I begin to feel beautiful.

2. Uncover the beauty God made in you. Sometimes we have got to peel off layers of ugliness we have allowed to coat our real selves. Unhealthy lifestyles disguise our beauty under the consequences of overeating and under-exercising. Time to get out the Nike’s and breathe in fresh air.

Most often uncovering our own beauty just means we need to pay attention to our good parts.  I once read an interview of make-up maven Bobbi Brown that fascinated me. She has made a fortune on women who don’t like the way they look. Her personal philosophy? Stop trying to cover the parts you don’t like and simply enhance your best features.

3. See yourself through your husband’s craving. Your husband needs to see you. He is not looking for perfection, hasn’t noticed those sunspots or saggy breasts. What he needs from you are glimpses of inviting beauty. Uncover just enough to give him what he needs, then allow yourself to respond to his response.

God made a point of the unashamed nakedness of the first married couple. He noted their ease with each other, their lack of hiding. Sin changed their perspective. Satan is the one who turned Eve’s eyes away from Adam’s response and onto her inadequacies.

It’s time we take back our beauty and own it, girls! It’s time we recapture that sensual swagger that somehow got lost by the lies we’ve come to believe.

It’s time to be beautiful.

From my heart,

Diane

PS: Can you tell us about your honeymoon? Did you see that delight in his eyes and feel more beautiful than you'd ever thought possible? Dare you show more of yourself now that your body no longer lives up to those pre-wedding-work-out expectations?

And for those of you whose husbands did not make you feel like the most alluring woman in the world , can I just say I am so sorry. There are men who inadvertently hurt their wives by what they don't say... it might be time to sit down and share your heart with him, letting him know how much you need to feel beautiful in order to respond beautifully.

(source)

Our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives.

We are no longer slaves to sin.

For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin.

Romans 6:6,7

NLT

I've been swimming since Sunday in the warm waters of Romans, chapter six. Dave Lomas, a friend of John Mark's preached a breath-taking message on what it means to be in Christ. One phrase has taken hold of my mind and just won't let go. He said,

Be who you are.

And by that he wasn't referring to 1990's pop-culture ads. He wasn't talking about individuality or giftedness or feel-good-about-yourself best sellers. He was talking about our identity- who I am.

Am I Diane, wife of Phil?

Or Diane, mother of John Mark? and Rebekah? and Elizabeth? and Matthew? Amma to five kids who love me  because I never say no?

Am I Diane, writer of a blog, teacher of women? Or am I Diane, cleaner of my house, cooker of meals, walker of my dog, Jackson?

Who am I really?

And this morning it dawns on me that  first and foremost I have chosen to be a slave of God. That is who I am- on purpose.

But now you are free from the power of sin and have become slaves of God.

Romans 6:22

NLT

So why in the world do I worry?  Written in my journal this morning are these words:

It strikes me this morning that all my tense worrying is ridiculous! Why would a slave worry? Or strive? Or fuss about not doing it good enough and now-no-one-will-want-to-read-it-and-oh-dear-I-don't-know-how-to-do-this...

 After all, as a slave of the Most High God, all I really need to do is check in with Him and make sure I'm doing what He wants. I don't have to be perfect- I'm a slave. I don't have to hurry- my Master is kind. I don't even have to prove myself- He liked me enough to buy me with His blood.

And that's why worrying is ridiculous. Because the truth about why I worry is this: I worry because I forget who I am.

I am accepted. Romans 8:1

I am loved. Romans 8:35-37

I am enough. Romans 8:15-17

I am forgiven. Romans 8:3

I am sought. Romans 8:30

I am free.  Romans 8:2

I am His. Romans 8:33

And so this morning I've rolled all my worries on my Master. I've let go control and asked Him for a chore list: What do You want me to do? Say? Write? 

I'm reveling in this rest that comes from letting Him lead me. Wondering why I keep slipping back into the old worrying-way. And I'm writing it down so I remember and so you remember... that all you and I really need to do is...

Be who you are.

From my heart,

Diane

repost from march 2013

I know I'm not the only worrying, fretting woman... how about you? What are you worried about? Dare you write it down and give it up? Dare you be who you really are? I'd love to know if you'd be willing to leave a comment.

Today I want to begin to introduce you to the team of women who design, create, implement, administrate, manage, and advise this blog we call He Speaks In The Silence. These are women who pray, asking God for wisdom, then use their gifts to craft beauty for all of us. And I think you need to know them!

So… for the next many weeks we’ll be posting a fun profile of who they are, what they do, what they love, who they love, how they live and lots more delicious details.

If you want to take a peak at the list of questions we all got to choose from, here it is.

From my heart,

Diane

BETHANY ALLEN

I live in:

Southeast Portland, in the Mount Tabor neighborhood

 I contribute to the blog by:

I (try) to contribute to the brainstorming and dreaming in our creative meetings and hope to provide support and input whenever and however I’m able.

This year, God is revealing Himself to me as:

Husband. As cliché as it sounds, this year God has been teaching me not only about His faithfulness as a husband who provides, protects and surprises, but also what it means for me to be wife (without actually being one).

Jesus is continually challenging me live (today) as though I am deeply loved, seen, and invited on an adventure. As I have learned to really believe these truths, the way I view myself and others has changed. There is a profound confidence and grace that comes from believing that you are loved perfectly.

My Meyers-Briggs is:

ENFJ (“The Giver”) and my top two love languages are physical touch and quality time.

My favorite spots in Portland are:

Breakfast: G R A V Y. Hands-down one of the best breakfast spots in town.

Lunch: Por Que No? I’m a huge fan of Mexican food…and it doesn’t hurt that Bryans Bowl is one of my all time favs.

Dinner: Screen Door. Best southern food in town. Always a win.

Dessert: YoCream. I’m a froyo kind of girl and they have the best in town.

When I was young I wanted to grow up to be:

An Animal Trainer at Sea World. I grew up in Florida and thought it would incredibly cool to swim with whales and dolphins all day.

(Plus I’d have access to the park all day, every day! I was a smart kid.)

The person who has had the biggest influence on me is:

My sister. She is the bravest and strongest woman I know. She has always lived a life of incredible faith and trust. My earliest memories of her always involve her doing something brave. She has an amazing ability to make others feel seen, heard and loved. Every person she meets is invited into a conversation that quickly moves beyond common politeness to sincere connection. I have learned more about Jesus from my sister’s life than I have anyone else.

Rebekah continually gives her life away in the name of Jesus and if I can grow up to be half the woman she is, I will have lived a worthy life.

One of my life scriptures is:

“The Lord makes firm the steps
of the one who delights in him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand.”

 Psalm 37:23-24

Psalm 37 was a passage of scripture I read over and over again during a hard season of my life. This verse still brings me crazy amounts of hope and assurance.

My favorite question to ask people is:

What’s your story? You can learn a lot about someone by his or her response to this question.

 What I really want for every woman to know is:

That you bear the image of God and that you have been invited into an incredible story that supersedes a specific role and is inherently linked to your God-given identity.

I am my lover’s,

the one he desires.

Come, my love,

let us go out into the fields

and spend the night

among the wildflowers.

There I will give you my love…

Song of Songs 7:10

Dear girls,

So many years ago, I cannot remember the when’s or the why’s, I found a Secret Switch that enabled me to go from stern its-bed-time-and-this-is-the-last-time-I’m-warning-you-to-stay-in-bed Mama, to loving, welcoming, alluring lover.

But before I tell you more, let me tell you why we need this switch, lest you dismiss my simple solution as unimportant and impractical…

We were made for a garden. Lush plantings, waving grasses, rushing streams spilling into deep pool— that’s that kind of place God created for our first surroundings. Roses and hibiscus, lavender and lilies to scent the air. Oaks and cedars for shade, moss and mint to sleep on, a cool mist rising to moisten our skin and water the earth.

The first husband and wife honeymooned in Eden.

And then the Fall changed everything… except our deep need for beauty.

Buried not-very-deep inside every woman is a craving for the beauty we were created for.  Its there every time you run your hand over something soft, every time your eye catches a particularly clear color, every time you hear the chime of bells or sniff that scent of fresh summer rain. The need for beauty pulls at your soul, begging for more.

But life is not always beautiful. We get dirty, we suffer, we sweat, we get tired and weary and worn down.

And isn’t that about how every young mother feels sometimes?

A mother’s reality is not anything like Esther’s— set apart for six months of beauty treatments and six months of soaking in oils. Instead, moms of little ones and teenagers and toddlers and carpools live like Ruth, out in the fields gleaning what she can from what little is offered her. Then she trudges home to try to figure out what to make for dinner. Again.

No wonder sometimes the last thing a woman at this stage of life wants is sex!

And yet… might there be a way to alter the story just enough to add a bit of that longed for beauty back into the everyday life of such a woman?

And that’s where my Secret Switch comes in. Every night- every single night, without exception- I take a long, sweetly scented bubble bath.

I know, I know, you thought I was going to say something super spiritual. That I read the entire Song of Solomon as soon as I tucked the kids in… nope. Just a bath.

That bath became symbolic for me.

A transition.

The kids were in bed, my chores done for the day, my energy usually at a low point. And every night I filled my tub with luxury. Skin softening, soul sweetening oils and bubbles and bath salts. I lit candles, turned the lights down low, got out something pretty to wear to bed, slathered myself with lotions and a spritz of perfume.

In that twenty minutes or so of feminine decadence, I sloughed off my mama skin and all the stresses that went with it, and emerged a woman.

A dip into beauty, that’s what a bath came to be for me.

Women-who-work-too-hard and mamas need this Secret Switch in order to want to be lovers to their husbands. Falling exhausted into bed with spit up on your ratty t-shirt just doesn’t induce feminine feelings of mounting passion. Ever.

But there’s more… once I stepped into that bathtub, my husband mostly took care of any unexpected needs from our children. As in, mom’s done now.

And more… our bedroom has always been beautiful. Even when money was tight. Even when vacations were mostly camping. Even when the rest of the house qualified for “fixer-upper” status.  No laundry folding, no bill paying, no stashing stuff in the corner. Our room is for romance… and sleep.

Your husband may not readily understand why you need him to take on guard duty while you bathe… or why he needs to supply you with bubble bath and pretty linegerie and a beautiful bedroom. But I can almost guarantee you that if you explain to him that you’re getting yourself ready for loving him sexually, he’ll go to great and heroic lengths to help!

You see, my dear girls, we women need a little help getting there sometimes. While men are stimulated all day long by images of sexually enticing women, those flashing ads and strutting bodies don’t get us very far.

And of course, he’s supposed to know that and help you with lovely words and lots of affection through out the day… but honestly? He’s out fighting battles for you, pretty much separated from his soft side.

When he gets home he’s raring to go and you’re way back there without a drop of desire propelling you to meet him anywhere near half way.

So if this is going to work well for both of you, you’re going to have to take responsibility to get yourself wanting what you know you both need.

That’s what the Secret Switch is all about.

And we’re in good company, girls….Naomi told Ruth just what I’m telling you. Read it for yourselves in Ruth chapter three while you take your bath.

From my heart,

Diane

P.S. Beauty in the bedroom and beauty in you… can you tell us all what makes you feel feminine and ready? Favorite scents? Best place to buy bubble bath? I’ll be Instagramming my favorite bath décor from my Pintrest all week. I’d love to see yours!

Today I want to begin to introduce you to the team of women who design, create, implement, administrate, manage, and advise this blog we call He Speaks In The Silence. These are women who pray, asking God for wisdom, then use their gifts to craft beauty for all of us. And I think you need to know them!

So… for the next many weeks we’ll be posting a fun profile of who they are, what they do, what they love, who they love, how they live and lots more delicious details.

If you want to take a peak at the list of questions we all got to choose from, here it is.

From my heart,

Diane

ALLISON DEPARTEE

I live in:

A townhouse community near Progress Ridge in Tigard.

I contribute to the blog by:

Helping brainstorm in our creative meetings, and will soon be heading up the social media team to help spread the word, and get more of you involved in the He Speaks community. We want this to be interactive and a place to cultivate real relationships.

This year, God is revealing Himself to me as:

My refuge. I’ve dealt with a decent amount of anxiety and depression the last few years, and have recently been learning that God has to be my FIRST refuge. I’m newly married and have had God remind me over and over that my husband is my helper and someone who points me to Jesus, but the ultimate peace and refuge I need comes from the SOURCE, Jesus. I’m slowly learning to run to Him before anyone or anything else to find my peace and security.

When I was young, I wanted to grow up and be:

Brace yourselves... my two career choices used to be either a librarian or a cheerleader. This pretty much sums up my personality and giftings, and I ironically did similar things in life as a grown up. A librarian gets to scan things, organize books, and wear glasses. I was all about office work and organization, and ironically ended up being an administrative assistant for Phil and Diane for 4 years! The cheerleader dream was because of my love for dancing, and the ability to be loud and encouraging. I like to believe God let me be a cheerleader by getting married. I am my husband’s biggest cheerleader and am always on the sidelines loudly cheering him on. Really though... I want to be a Mommy:)

One of my life scriptures is:

Matthew 5:16 which says, “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” I feel like this verse encapsulates the gospel and the great commission. My hope is that I would bring light everywhere I go. I’ve made it my goal to be light in dark places every opportunity I have. At cash registers, in restaurants, on my blog, and in my neighborhood. I want my face to shine like Moses’ did when he came down from the mountain! I even tattooed the word “light” on my foot as a reminder of my call.

My favorite Portland spots are:

Dinner: Our go to spot and FAVORITE restaurant is Dang’s Thai Kitchen in Lake Oswego just off 43. If you like Thai, this is seriously the best Thai we’ve ever had.

Lunch: Cha Cha Cha (usually the NW location) for a good selection of ala carte tacos. Also Lovejoy Bakers in the Pearl. Love the atmosphere and fresh & creative sandwiches.

Treats: Lately I’ve been into juice bars, and am desperately hoping for one to pop up in the burbs. So far I’ve tried Portland Juice Press, Greenleaf, Prasad, Kure and Local Choice Market. Our spontaneous dessert choice is usually a late night run for Burgerville shakes. Yum!

Where we go to dream: Schoolhouse Electric. We love to grab a warm drink at Ristretto and then dream up our perfect home as we walk through the staged living spaces.

Something I love to do every year is:

Go on tour with my husband. Nick plays guitar for the christian band Kutless, and so our lifestyle is anything but ordinary. Since we spend quite a bit of time apart, one of my favorite things is being able to go out on the bus with him. It’s such a privilege to be able to go to work with my husband, and travel all over the country. I love the adventure of waking up in a new place each morning, and discovering new towns and cultures. It is usually a refreshing time for me to get to see first hand what ministry I’m supporting when I say goodbye to my husband each week. I LOVE watching him play God inspired songs that he helped write, and seeing the way that people’s lives are impacted. It always helps fuel me for tour dates that I stay home.

What I really want every woman to know is:

“You are fearfully and wonderfully made...”  (Psalm 139:14). God made no mistake when forming you. The latter half of that verse says, “wonderful are Your works, and my soul knows it very well.” Learn to know it very well. Believe His promises to you, and find your worth in Him. I also want to remind you all that you aren’t alone. I think we all try to play off this facade that we’re perfect. We’re not:) We’re all struggling for security and we need each other! Be real and honest, and lift each other up.

If I could spend a year anywhere in the world, I would go to:

I would LOVE to spend a year exploring Europe. I’ve never been, and would love to take trains and planes all over until I saw it all. I think I’d start with London, then to the English countryside, maybe a little Paris, Germany, Scotland, and of COURSE hop over to Italy and Greece. I’d probably spend most of my time eating, but would just love to learn new cultures and explore historic cities with my husband.

Where to find me:

Website: www.lifeofdepartee.com

Twitter: @allydepartee

Instagram: @allydepartee

 (source)

God has told his people, “Here is a place of rest; let the weary rest here. This is a place of quiet rest.”

Isaiah 28:12 

Remember the Sabbath…

Exodus 20:18

Fog wraps the morning in magic.  Shimmering like a woman’s gown, sheer as finest silk, it hides the world beyond the trees.

And I sit wrapped in warmth, watching the Artist create. Soaking in His beauty, soul filling with wonder.

What was it I was worried about?

All those frettings seem silly now. Petty, unimportant.

So what if I don’t get it done? Isn’t this more important? This watching, waiting, listening?

And so again this morning He speaks to me.

Hush, Di, I’m working. This is My world, not yours.

Just watch a while.

Listen in the silence.

Learn.

And so I choose rest today instead of striving, peace instead of churning, less instead of more.

I choose to notice God today. All day.

To stop all my fussing and just make space for Him in this cluttered soul of mine.To push aside the messiness of my needing to do more and allow my body and my mind and my imagination to simply stroll today.

I’ll walk through His woods, crunch leaves underfoot, breathe deeply, notice the faintest fragrance He leaves behind.

 I’ll sabbath.

From a heart needing rest,

Diane

repost: december 2013

This week, Phil and I took a road trip in his mini-cooper convertible to Victoria, BC.  It’s a romantic, European-style city sitting on a busy harbor, surrounded by breathtaking countryside. We went to celebrate 35 years of marriage— three and a half decades.

 And while we were there we talked about how we’ve seen our love grow and flourish— and we talked about those not-so-nice times when we’ve been at each other’s throats, cranky, self-centered, off. Because two strong-willed, opinionated, passionately idealistic people like us most definitely have those “off “ times too.

And we talked about the fact that not every one of those twelve thousand seven hundred and seventy-five days of married life has been smooth and peace-filled or even close to the way we would have scripted…

We’ve lived in four different cities and moved thirteen times. (stress!) We managed four pregnancies (stress!) and raised four children (stress!) through sleepless nights, (stress!) toddler tempers (stress!) and teenage worries (extreme stress!).

We’ve had a few hardships too— my unexpected and unexplained deafness, Matt’s juvenile diabetes, difficult bosses, relationships gone bad.

We’ve been swindled, criticized, hurt, misunderstood.

Real life stuff.

So how is it that I can say I am honestly, really, more in love with my husband today than I could have possibly imagined on July 15, 1978?

The answer is so simple.

I wish every man knew this secret.

I wish every girl dating the guy she thinks she might want to marry knew it.

I wish every couple struggling to stay married and stay happy knew it.

I wish I could brand it across the brain of every married man so that he had to see it before he made a choice that could unravel and wreck his wife’s love…

Drums roll….

I am passionately in love with my husband after thirty-five years of real life because I respect him.

That’s it. Simple. Basic. Doable. Truth.

He’s far from perfect- a big personality like his comes with certain side effects. And though goodness knows, I’ve tried, I’ve never managed to quiet him down or neaten him up. He’s not a man to be controlled or coerced into doing things my way.

No, I don’t feel all this passion for him because he’s reached the pinnacle of the Ideal Husband, or followed Ten Steps Guaranteed To Make Your Wife Happy Forever.

My feelings of love for Phil are rooted in days and weeks and years and decades of watching him relentlessly, doggedly align his steps one at a time to follow Jesus. Not perfectly, but persistently. Every day.

And I’m not talking about rule-abiding, moralizing, rigidity. Every attitude, every decision, every emergency, every heart-ache, every disappointment, every bump in the road of real life, gets wrestled to the foot of the Cross. Surrendered.

And that’s why I am more in love with this man today than I ever would have thought possible 35 years ago.

I wish every man realized that a woman’s feelings of love are wrapped up tight in her respect for him.

I wish every woman knew that a man who is good and godly will grow more and more attractive and compelling and sensuously appealing as the years go by.

One choice at a time… that’s all it takes to win the love of a woman for a lifetime.

From my heart,

Diane

PS. Girls- can you leave a list of why you love your husband/boyfriend/fiancé? Might just be an insightful read into the way a woman loves.

Next week, we will talk about the "Secret Switch" I mentioned last week!

Today I want to begin to introduce you to the team of women who design, create, implement, administrate, manage, and advise this blog we call He Speaks In The Silence. These are women who pray, asking God for wisdom, then use their gifts to craft beauty for all of us. And I think you need to know them!

So… for the next many weeks we’ll be posting a fun profile of who they are, what they do, what they love, who they love, how they live and lots more delicious details.

If you want to take a peak at the list of questions we all got to choose from, here it is.

ABI PORTER

I live in: off Alberta in NE Portland

I contribute to the blog by:

Photography and Kitchen posts here and there.

On my perfect day:

I would go on a brunch date with my husband, Josh, then go sit on the beach in Sauvies Island and read a good book.

Three of my favorite books/blogs are:

Books:

The glass castle

The night circus

A million little pieces

Blogs:

Oh happy day

Design sponge

Creature comforts

If I could spend a year anywhere in the world:

I would go to Paris. We’ve been there twice and I’m trying to convince him we need to live there for a year ;)

The next big challenge:

I'll be tackling is motherhood. Oy! So excited to have a little one this fall but already praying for wisdom daily!

The iPhone app I wouldn't want to live without is:

I’m a budgeting freak so definitely AceBudget

My favorite thing in my home: 

My vitamix. (or my cats!)

This year, God is revealing himself to me as:

Trustworthy. So often I forget to lean in and trust him through small trials and large yet he’s been so gracious even though I fail at this over and over.

One of my life scriptures is:

Philippians 2:3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.

Where you can find me:

Website: www.vanillaandlace.com

Instagram: @vanillaandlace

I'm a Fall and Winter kind of girl through and through. I love the boots, the scarves, the rain, the cold...

But I've got to hand it to Summer when it comes to the food.

Fresh, colorful, crunchy, flavorful... Summer produce is my favorite.

I recently took a trip to the Beaverton Farmer's Market and couldn't stop buying fresh vegetables at every tent I walked into. I think I bought something from just about every farm in Oregon!

(some girls get giddy about shoes, I get ecstatic about veggies. Ok, and shoes too)

Today's recipe is a taste of just about everything you will see at your local farmer's market right now and I can't stop eating it. It can easily be adapted and tweaked to include what you have in your fridge and what suits your palate. It can be used as a main course, a side or a refreshing lunch.

If you haven't ventured out to a local farmer's market yet this summer, I highly recommend them!

ENJOY!

Elizabeth

PS: I hope you are enjoying the fresh food to easily available to us right now as I am and I'd love to hear what you've been making in your own kitchens. Leave me a comment or tag your latest creations on Instagram with #hespeaksthekitchen.

FARMER'S MARKET SALAD + CREAMY PARSLEY DRESSING

Serves 4-6

INGREDIENTS:

CREAMY PARSLEY DRESSING:

(adapted from this cookbook)

1 heaping cup of chopped parsley

¼ C olive oil

¼ C real mayonnaise or veganise

3 T apple cider vinegar

2 T water

1 T honey

½ tsp sea salt

¼ tsp pepper

 

FARMER'S MARKET SALAD:

2 hearts of romaine - chopped

2 big handfuls of arugula – roughly chopped

1 red bell pepper – sliced

2 big handfuls of shredded carrots

4 radishes – thinly sliced

½ C green onions – chopped

½ - 1 C cherry tomatoes – cut in half or quartered

 TO MAKE:

Combine all the creamy parsley dressing ingredients in a blender and blend until creamy.

Combine salad ingredients in a large bowl and toss with desired amount of dressing.

TO SERVE:

This can be enjoyed so many ways! Here are a few ideas...

Serve as a side for salmon or burgers. I have a few recipes on the site that would pair well with and you can find them in the recipe archive.

Toss with grilled chicken.

For a vegetarian option, add garbanzo beans.

Topped with fresh parmesan cheese for a fresh lunch.

[print_this]

Farmer’s Market Salad + Creamy Parsley Dressing

Serves 4-6

INGREDIENTS: 

Creamy Parsley Dressing:

(adapted from this cookbook)

1 heaping cup of chopped parsley

¼ C olive oil

¼ C real mayonnaise or veganise

3 T apple cider vinegar

2 T water

1 T honey

½ tsp sea salt

¼ tsp pepper

Farmer's Market Salad:

2 hearts of romaine - chopped

2 big handfuls of arugula – roughly chopped

1 red bell pepper – sliced

2 big handfuls of shredded carrots

4 radishes – thinly sliced

½ C green onions – chopped

½ - 1 C cherry tomatoes – cut in half or quartered

TO MAKE:

Combine all the creamy parsley dressing ingredients in a blender and blend until creamy.

Combine salad ingredients in a large bowl and toss with desired amount of dressing.

TO SERVE:

This can be enjoyed so many ways! Here are a few ideas...

Serve as a side for salmon or burgers. I have a few recipes on the site that would pair well with and you can find them in the recipe archive.

Toss with grilled chicken.

For a vegetarian option, add garbanzo beans.

Topped with fresh parmesan cheese for a fresh lunch. [/print_this]

“… my lover is content with me…”

Song of Songs 7:10

Dear girls, 

Last week we unlocked the reality that for some of us at certain times, we no longer look forward to making love with our husbands.

Sex has lost its allure and all we want is to be left alone.

Not exactly the hot topic at bridal showers.

I listed three reasons I am hearing from women for not wanting sex:

1. Feeling disappointment with your husband’s lack of romance

2. Feeling physically and emotionally depleted

3. Feeling unattractive

There are other causes, of course, but these are the ones most of us will encounter at some stage of our lives. These are reality, life as it really happens.

And just like I told you last week, the solutions are simple… and oh so hard.

In your own strength, you’re doomed for failure, girls. But if you can learn to come to the real Lover of your soul to be filled over and over again by Him… He’ll spill all His great love over you with enough left over to splash passion all over your husband-- whether he “deserves” it or not.

Today I want to talk about those times of your life when “you’re too tired, too busy, and your to-do list is too long” when you have “too many little ones touching you and taking from you all day and into the night.”

You know your husband has desires but you’re so busy meeting everyone else’s needs you just add them to the list of to-do’s that don’t get done.

Ah yes, the best years of a woman’s life… (sarcastic twinkle inserted here with a bit of a chuckle at the ridiculousness of those words!) It’s so easy to romanticize and reimagine what the reality of babies and toddlers is really like.

I had babies and toddlers and teenagers all at the same time. When Matthew was temper tantruming his way through grocery stores, I had adolescent daughters overdosing on hormones. Oh yeah, fun days. And I well remember the feeling that if one more person touched me I’d shatter into a million fragments.

My nest is now empty. It stays clean. I pop into the grocery store all by myself to pick up whatever I need without anyone crying or fussing or demanding or needing to go to the bathroom. I make one bed every morning and it stays made until I pull back the covers at night. No one wakes me up in the morning. No one interrupts my quiet time. No one leaves great gobs of toothpaste smeared over the counters and onto the towel.

Amazing.

But for many of you, I’m fully aware that you’re facing a different scenario. The thought of going to the grocery store alone shines right up there with 5-star resorts and white sand beaches. And the thought of one more person needing something, anything from you is enough to send you into your own tailspin of door-slamming temper tantrum.

Sex is the last thing you want before you fall into your unmade bed to snatch a few desperate hours of oblivion.

But, dear daughters of mine, I’m here to prescribe the most restorative, rejuvenating, and relaxing treatment possible for your exhaustion. Sex.

God made sex to be good for you.

As in really good.

As in if-I’d-known-how-much-I-needed-this-I’d-have-moved-mountains-to-make-it-happen kind of good for you.

Here’s what I mean:

When you give yourself to your husband fully and passionately, your body releases drugs into your system that make you feel good. Great, in fact.

Drugs like DOPAMINE, which feeds your brain with “feel good” effects. It is called the reward hormone, in that it immediately works to flood you with hope and out-going assertiveness. It is also responsible for those “feelings of falling in love” in both men and women.

Having sex with your husband will actually make you fall in love with him all over again… and he with you.

And then there’s SEROTONIN- the very thing sleep deprived mothers don’t ever have enough of. Guess what? A potent orgasm releases vast reserves of serotonin into your system, making you relax and leaving you feeling emotionally satisfied. Doctors call it the “happy hormone” because it has the same effect as anti-depressants.

Feeling kind of distant from your husband these days? OXYTOCIN is known as the cuddle chemical because it causes both men and women to want to be close and intimate. It is the same hormone released right after birth, that high that instantly bonds a mother to her baby. It is “the chemical basis for our capacity and longing for romantic attachment and causes feelings of love, tenderness and wellbeing.”

Seriously, girls, sex is good for you! And good for your marriage. God designed a woman’s body to thrive by giving her body to her husband passionately.

However… when a woman uses her body to steal illicit sexuality from a man, these are the same physical responses that leave her feeling used and betrayed and deeply scarred by what should have been and wasn’t. That is why God so adamantly warns us to wait for marriage. Girls, take heed!

So… drumrolls, how does a mother of babies and toddlers and teenagers summon up the energy to send those signals to her husband that yes, she does want him? How does she convince herself?

And that is exactly what I’m hoping you’ll help me with.

Moms- tell us, please! Talk to each other here by leaving comments and advice and ideas and what’s working for you now.

Older women, can you remember those days? Did you give up and regret it? Or did you figure something out and flourish?

Please, please, please pass on your wisdom here. Leave comments or send emails. If you’re aghast at the idea of talking about sex so publically then post anonymously.

Be tasteful, but be honest. I’ll compile your wisdom and pass it on. Together we’ll figure this out and do all we can to help marriages to thrive.

And next week I’m posting about what worked for me… one Secret Switch that worked like magic to transform me from mother to lover during those baby/toddler/teenager years.

I love you girls!

From my heart,

Diane

(source)

Today I want to begin to introduce you to the team of women who design, create, implement, administrate, manage, and advise this blog we call He Speaks In The Silence. These are women who pray, asking God for wisdom, then use their gifts to craft beauty for all of us. And I think you need to know them!

So… for the next many weeks we’ll be posting a fun profile of who they are, what they do, what they love, who they love, how they live and lots more delicious details.

If you want to take a peak at the list of questions we all got to choose from, here it is.

ALLIE RICE

I live in:

Northeast Portland, in the Irvington neighborhood.

I contribute to the blog by:

Creating and maintaining the space where all these words and pictures live. In partnership with the team, I designed the layout for the blog, and I keep the technical behind-the-scenes pieces working smoothly.

This year, God is revealing himself to me as:

Redeemer. That was the name of God that I received at the women’s night in prayer this year, and he is showing me his desire to redeem things — things in me, things in my life, things in others — that I thought would be forever broken. The specifics of how he will redeem are still unclear in places, and I don’t know what it will look like over the weeks, months, and years to come — but I’m awed by the relentless, extravagant grace of God and his heart for sanctifying us to holiness, reconciling us to faithfulness, and restoring us to wholeness. His story is always the same: He is in the business of taking broken people and giving them life. “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you... For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.” (Isaiah 43:1-2, 19)

My favorite Portland spots are:

Too numerous to count! I’ll try to narrow it down to three in each category...

Breakfast: Petite Provence, Tin Shed, Waffle Window

Food carts: Grilled Cheese Grill, Native Bowl, Pyro Pizza

Coffee: Costello’s Travel Caffe, Barista, JoLa

Sweets: Salt and Straw, Swirl, dessert at Irving Street Kitchen

Happy hour: Casa del Matador, Meriwether’s, The Station

Gifts: Ink and Peat, Branch and Birdie, Canoe

Casual date night: Por Que No, Kennedy School, The Blue Olive

Moderate ($$) date night: Nuestra Cocina, Toro Bravo, Piazza Italia

Fancy ($$$) date night: Veritable Quandary, Park Kitchen, St. Jack

One of my life scriptures is:

Zephaniah 3:17. I know this is a favorite for many, and with good reason; it speaks powerfully into every season of life. “The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.”

My Myers-Briggs/Enneagram/love languages are:

I’m Enneagram Type 2 (“The Helper”) with a 1-wing (“The Servant”). On Myers-Briggs, I’m an INFJ (“The Protector” or “The Foreseer Developer”) — with a maxed-out, yes-to-every-question J. My primary love language is Words of Affirmation.

When I was young, I wanted to grow up and be:

A veterinarian. When other kids were playing doctor on their dolls, I was playing vet on my stuffed animals, complete with Ace bandages and a stethoscope.

The person who has had the biggest influence on me is:

My mom. She is a woman truly after God’s own heart and has set an amazing example of godly motherhood and wifehood since I was a little girl. She gave me freedom to be my own person and security in who I am as a woman, a daughter, and a child of God. Her heart is filled with a joy that I will spend my entire life trying to emulate. I assign such high value to generosity, humility, family, beauty, and grace because of my mom and the way she holds these things as sacred. There is not one thing in my life that would be the same had she not prayed big, honest, faithful, life-giving prayers, day in and day out, for the last 28 years — and I know this is only the tip of the iceberg. Prayers that I don’t even know about, that she has already prayed, and that she continues to pray, will define my life every day of every week of every year for the rest of my life.

My lifestyle, in three words:

Thoughtful, graceful, grateful.

What I really want every woman to know is:

You are a dearly beloved child of the living God. That is your identity — not your sin, not your flesh, not your past. He made you, he knows you, he sees you — and he pursues you, not because of who you are or what you’ve done but because of who he is and what he has created you to be. Stop striving to live up to your identity; you’ve already received it. Instead, live in your identity in the Spirit. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

Where you can find me:

Website: http://www.alliecreative.com

Twitter: @alliecreative

Instagram: @alliecreative

Today I want to begin to introduce you to the team of women who design, create, implement, administrate, manage, and advise this blog we call He Speaks In The Silence. These are women who pray, asking God for wisdom, then use their gifts to craft beauty for all of us. And I think you need to know them!

So… for the next many weeks we’ll be posting a fun profile of who they are, what they do, what they love, who they love, how they live and lots more delicious details.

If you want to take a peak at the list of questions we all got to choose from, here it is.

And since  every single woman on this team is reluctant to go first, they insisted I jump in ahead of them to make sure the water’s not too deep!

From my heart,

Diane

I live in:

Tigard, in a house in the suburbs that I keep trying to make into a cottage in the country…

I contribute to the blog by:

Dreaming, thinking, praying, pondering, creating the team, studying, loving… and writing the content.

This year, God is revealing himself to me as:

Lover. And I gulp a little as I say that. Years ago I read a biography of a Victorian-era single missionary woman who claimed the Song of Songs as her favorite book of the Bible. Although she read the words primarily as an allegory of her relationship with God, (most scholars believe it is first and foremost an intimate look at real love the way God designed it) I was intrigued by the audacity of seeing Him as my Lover. And now I’m beginning to get it. To understand that His love for me is jealous, all-consuming, pursuing, protective, intimate, knowing, tender, accepting, and, in a beautiful way, just a little blind. He loves me (and you!) for who I am. Amazing. Magnificent. Life changing.

My favorite Portland spots are:

For wandering: Forest Park, the Rose Garden, the Japanese Garden, Bishop’s Close.

For eating: I love to try new places… small places… Northwest cuisine is fresh and innovative and down-to-earth and just so good.

For a good cup of tea: Smith’s Tea is a quiet, peaceful place.

For shopping for my home: Sellwood’s many vintage shops, full of a fun mixture of junk and beauty.

For a fun day of shopping with a friend: NW 23^rd area, every shop is lovely and girly.

For a romantic dinner with Phil: Piazza Italia in the Pearl, so authentically Italian.

If I could spend a year anywhere in the world, I would go to:

For winter: I’d hole up in a cabin in Bear Valley, California. It stays snowed in all winter so I’d hibernate and write a book…

For spring: I’d choose someplace with wildflower strewn meadows and gentle sunshine, a farm maybe…where I could play around with writing another book…

For summer: I’d find a cozy cottage in the Lake District of Northern England. I’d wander the hills, read fairy tales, maybe even write a magical, mystical story for my grandkids…

For fall: I’d want a coastal hideaway on a wild and stormy beach. Maybe on the ocean side of Vancouver Island, or tucked into a cove near Carmel Highlands where I could take long walks on the beach and read great books and dream about writing one of my own…

One of my life scriptures is:

Psalm 40

I waited patiently for the Lord;
And He inclined to me and heard my cry.

He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay,
And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm.

He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; 
Many will see and fear
And will trust in the Lord.

The person who has had the biggest influence on me is:

No doubt about it, my husband. Phil has taught me and led me and loved me and shown me what it means to walk with God for more than three decades. He has allowed me to be myself even when the me-that-I-am-is sometimes peculiar and forgetful and introverted and intense.

The next big challenge I’m tackling is:

Slowing down to do just a few things well. Letting go of doing some of the things I love in order to keep my soul in a place of rest. Daring to trust God by creating space to listen to His words and to write what I hear.

On my perfect day I would:

Get up early…fix myself a pot of Marco Polo tea…read and listen, write and dream for a long while…putter around my home…take a long meandering walk with my dog, Jackson… go out to a late lunch at one of Portland’s food carts with Phil… walk around the city at night when the lights are just coming on… go home and go to bed early with a good book… and find time in there to write some thoughts about something…

Something I love to do every year is:

Go to my parent’s home high in the Sierra Nevadas. The view off the back deck is breathtaking! As we’re driving up highway 4 through the Gold Country on our way there, both of us start to relax, breathing in the fragrance of a place that has been a refuge for us. When we get there we love to hike and swim in the river and picnic by the stream that runs right through the town of Murphy’s. I read fun books, we take naps, watch movies, eat fresh foods, take long walks and dream big dreams. Some of our favorite memories as a family center around that little mountain town.

What I really want every woman to know is:

That real rest, real satisfaction, real hope and delight comes in that intimate closeness the Father longs to have with us. And that He speaks there- words that He wants us to hear- wisdom for life, for love, for happiness.

Where you can find me:

Website: www.hespeaksinthesilence.com

Twitter: @dianewcomer

Instagram: @dianecomer